KHUTAB IV: 23. INTERFAITH MARRIAGE
23. INTERFAITH
MARRIAGE
(ANUMA 12 JUNE
2009)
Brothers
in Islam,
In my khuṭbah about mixed
marriage according to Islam which is actually a respond to a friend’s request
in this matter, he suggested that my sentence “It is prohibited for a
non-Muslim male to marry a Muslim female” should be added with “unless he
converted to the Islamic faith.” For me, this expression “unless he
converted to the Islamic faith” is redundant and unnecessary, because if he
converts to Islam he will be no longer non-Muslim, and the prohibition will
become nullified. It is like saying, “It is prohibited for a non-Muslim to go
to pilgrimage in Makkah unless he converts to Islam, it is prohibited for a
Muslim drink alcohol unless he becomes apostate, it is prohibited to proceed
when the traffic light is red, unless it turns green.”
The other feedback is that translating the word makrūh
as “reprehensible” seems to be a too strong word, as it means “not tolerated,
blame, censure” and asked, “Shouldn't ‘makrūh’
mean “preferably not but acceptable”? My
respond is as follows:
If we go back to the origin of the word makrūh it
is derived from the verb
1. kariha – yakrahu –karhan,
kurhan, karāhatan, karāhiyatan which means
“to feel disgust (at), be disgusted (by); to detest, loath, abhor, hate; to
dislike”
2. karuha –yakruhu – karāhatan which means “to be repugnant, offensive, hateful,
odious, detestable”
The word makrūh, literally means
something “detested, abhorred, hated, hateful, odious, loathsome, disgusting,
distasteful, disagreeable, unpleasant” In Islamic law it is translated as
“reprehensible, abominable”. In this case, although the word makrūh has
also the sense of "preferably not but acceptable" as suggested in the
feedback, the word itself indicates
of being
discouraged and detested. When something is extremely makrūh it
could come to a level close to ḥarām (prohibited), and مَكْرُوْهٌ
كَرَاهَةَ التَّحْرِيْم. However,
the lenient meaning of makrūh is “inconvenience, discomfort, nuisance,
adversity; accident, mishap, misadventure,[1] such as the expressionأَصَابَهُ
مَكْرُوْهٌ meaning
“something unpleasant (accident) happened to him.” But this cannot be applied
to a Muslim male marrying a non-Muslim female, because marriage is intentional,
an act of personal choice and not accidental.
The feed-back also says,
Whilst your article gives an insight into past
mistakes, I feel that it is hard for me to use it as
points to articulate that view. The reason is today's
youth or generation are brought up to reason
unlike the
past where people are less educated and do not
questions
what they have been asked to do so. This is not to
suggest
they are less intelligent but more because they were
brought up in a submissive society. Today's Muslim
youths in Western society are better educated,
independent and is more able to express
and articulate views better than
the older generations.
What he means is our younger generation is brought up
to ask the reason for everything, including mixed marriage in Islam. The most difficult
question to answer is “why?”, especially if it is Allah’s prescription: Why
should we pray five times, not twice, why should we prostrate twice in every rak‘ah
in our prayer, not once, and why should we bow once and not twice? Why is pork ḥarām
although we cook it or even burn it into ashes so that no bacteria would
survive in it? Allah said
لَا يُسْأَلُ عَمَّا
يَفْعَلُ وَهُمْ يُسْأَلُونَ ( الأنبياء :٢٣)
He
cannot be questioned as to what He does
while they will be
questioned (Q.
21:23)
In our daily life we have to obey the traffic light, you have to stop
on red light, although you are sure there is no car approaching, and we do not
question it, because we know that it is for our own benefit and safety.
There is danger in mixed marriage, as the gap between
Islam and other religions is deep. In Islamic marriage the union between the
husband and the wife is supposed to continue to the next world, the Hereafter,
that they will be admitted together to Heaven, while in mixed marriage, the
non-Muslim wife will not. The Qur’ān states many times that believers (in Islam
and do good things) will enter Heaven (Q. 2:82; 4:124; 7:42; 9:111; 11:23;
19:60; 29:58; 36:26; 40:40; 43:70; 46:15-16); non-believers, rejecters of Islam called in Islam kāfir, are not only
deprived from Heaven, but also will suffer in Hell (Q. 7:40; 2:39, 126,
174-175, and 217; 3:10, and 116; 7:36; 8:14; 9:17; 13:5, and 35; 14:28-30;
21:39; 22:72; 24:57; 33:64-66; 38:27;
39:8; 40:6; 45:31-34; 46:20 and 34; and 64:10).
According to Islam, reason alone is not sufficient to
be our guidance in this life, as it has its limitation, and therefore we need
revelation. What we think is abnormal in the past may become normal today, such
as living together out of wedlock, marriage of the same sex, to mention a few.
Allah brings laws to be obeyed called sharī‘ah for our benefit. The
objective of the shariah is to preserve: religion, individual life and
honour, wealth, family and progeny.
Beware that wealth and children could turn
into enemy. This is the warning from Allah, Who says:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آَمَنُوا إِنَّ
مِنْ أَزْوَاجِكُمْ وَأَوْلَادِكُمْ عَدُوًّا لَكُمْ فَاحْذَرُوهُمْ
وَإِنْ تَعْفُوا وَتَصْفَحُوا وَتَغْفِرُوا
فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ غَفُورٌ رَحِيمٌ (التغابن : ١٤)
O you who believe! Verily, among your wives and
your children there are
enemies for you (who may stop
you from the obedience of
Allah); therefore beware
of them! But if you pardon
(them) and overlook,
and forgive (their faults), then verily, Allah
is
Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful (Q.64:14)
Your
children may blame you for allowing them interfaith marriage when you know the
danger of it in term of the continuation of commitment to Islam.
The other feed-back of a friend is
that as we are living in Western society, where most of us are first generation
migrants, what are the chances of today Muslim youths marrying someone of their
ownfaith? Very slim I must confess.
My response to this argument is that there are many
Muslim families who have many sons and daughters of marriageable age, and they
have many chances to find each other through parents, friends, Islamic
organizations that arrange match-making.
It is true that the companions of the
Prophet s.a.w. when they migrated to spread Islam did have any fear in
their mind of mixed marriage, as they were scholars of Islam and had strong
faith, unlike the youth of present
generation living in the West where many if not most of them have limited
knowledge and faith in Islam.
Becoming a Muslim and embracing Islam is a commitment,
as it is a way of life. There are many prescriptions to be followed, such as
establishing the five-daily prayers, abstaining from alcohol, eating port and
gambling, total surrender to the will of God (Allah). One does not become a
Muslim just to marry a Muslim girl without following its teachings.
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